The Subconscious Muse

Taking some quarterly time off of social media to enjoy summertime!! Much love to you all 🥰🫶🏼

In what ways can you lead by example this week?

There's a tradition in South Texas // cascarones, confetti eggs // that most people experience once a year and never think about again. Someone cracks a dyed eggshell over your head at a spring festival, confetti rains down, everyone laughs. Cute. Disposable.

Nobody asks the real question: why an eggshell?

As the story goes, the custom traces back through European nobility, possibly reaching Mexico in the 1860s during Emperor Maximilian's … where hollowed, perfumed eggs were part of courtship ritual before they became festival confetti.

That lineage is contested and thinly documented.

What isn't contested is what the object actually does, and that's the part worth stealing for how you think about performance.

The mechanism.//

Before a cascarón is anything else, it's emptied.

Someone pierces the shell, drains the contents, cleans it out, dries it … and only then fills it with confetti.

The fragile outer form stays intact.

What's inside is replaced entirely.

Then.. it sits, indistinguishable from a raw egg, until the exact moment it's cracked // and what comes out isn't yolk.

It's color.
It's celebration.

It's the thing that was deliberately put there.

It’s not just decor… it’s engineered transformation wearing the disguise of spontaneity.

Most founder-CEOs are running the opposite process.

You built the shell … the title, the revenue, the team, the reputation … and never touched what's inside it. The internal contents are still whatever got poured in during childhood, during the first hard year of the business, during the relationship that taught you what safety costs.

The shell hardened around unexamined material.

Then, you wonder why cracking under pressure produces yolk … mess, reactivity, the thing you didn't mean to show your team … instead of something you'd choose to release.

The subconscious doesn't get politely updated because your business card changed.

It has to be deliberately emptied and deliberately refilled.

That's the entire premise of subconscious reprogramming, and it's the opposite of "just think positive" … it's structural, and it's done before the pressure event, not during it.

This is the actual difference between a founder who cracks and one who releases.

Both get pierced by pressure … a board conversation, a failed launch, a team member quitting on a Friday.

One spills whatever was never dealt with.
The other releases something engineered: composure that was installed on purpose, not performed under duress.

That's the work inside the CEO Performance & Team Flow Intensive. Not adding a new skill on top of the shell. Going inside it, before the next crack happens … because it will.

*If the shell metaphor lands for you personally … if you recognize the moment your composure cracked and something you didn't choose came out … my work allows you to go deeper into what gets poured back in once you stop protecting the shell and start rebuilding the contents.*

What are you
grateful for?

The last five years have changed how I evaluate everything .. (when my health became my priority).

People.
Products.
Companies.
Myself.

When you’ve been through enough heartbreak, betrayal, and loss, something shifts.

You stop being impressed by charisma.
You stop confusing confidence with character.
You stop assuming that because something looks successful, it’s healthy.

For a long time I thought I was grieving a person.

I wasn’t. I was grieving trust itself.

Trust in people who called us family.
Trust in leaders who said they were building for everyone.
Trust in communities that felt unbreakable until the day they weren’t.

Losing that kind of trust rearranges you.

Years ago I asked one question about everything: is the product good?

Then, once I started coaching CEOs instead of just representing them, the question matured: are the people good?

Today I ask something different: what does the psychology of this organization actually reward?

Because every bonus, every promotion, every leader who gets applauded in the room … that’s the real value system. Not the mission statement on the wall.

Some cultures reward truth, curiosity, honest disagreement, servant leadership.

Others reward obedience, silence, image over integrity, loyalty over honesty, volume over people.

You will never find out which one you’re standing in by reading the deck. You find out by watching who gets rewarded for telling the truth … and who gets rewarded for staying quiet.

That’s true in companies.
It’s true in friendships, marriages, families.
It’s true in life.

While we dance in vulnerability, true strength emerges when the feminine allows her heart to open unfettered to raw authenticity.

Receiving becomes the next aligned activity, and in this exposure lies the true power of vulnerability.

I thought about this idea and realized something I hadn’t said out loud yet.

Healing isn’t teaching how to be more open.
It’s teaching how to be honest with oneself about what safety actually feels like.

Discernment isn’t the opposite of vulnerability. Discernment is what makes vulnerability possible in the first place.

For a long time I thought healing meant learning how to trust again.

I don’t think that’s the real work anymore.

Healing is learning who deserves my trust.

Those are two completely different journeys. I spent years training for the first one. I’m only now starting the second.

If any of this landed, let’s connect … I had to learn the hardest way how to tell the difference between vulnerability and self-abandonment, and why discernment is the skill that protects your heart instead of closing it.

Allow me to guide you.

Do you agree?