Rise Neurodiversity Centre

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AAC does not replace speech. It replaces silence. It creates access to connection, expression, autonomy, and participation. Supporting communication in all forms allows individuals to be heard, understood, and included.

This is inspiring to see how hard autism self advocates can fight, but heartbreaking to see that it is still such a reality! We have signed the campaign… let’s Join Hands and get more people to sign!

As a Postdoctoral Research Fellow, my colleagues and I are conducting a significant project focused on neurodiversity, specifically examining the experiences of neurodiverse students. We explore their challenges and frustrations, as well as their achievements. Publishing articles and supervising students are my full-time responsibilities and commitments.

Additionally, I am a self-advocate for autism; I am a 33-year-old autistic man, and autism is a part of my daily life as a husband, son, and academic. We experience the realities of autism every single day in our family home.

But today broke something inside of me.

And at the same time, it reminded me exactly why I can never stop fighting for neurodivergent individuals and families in South Africa.

By now, many people know that I am leading the National Autism Strategy campaign in South Africa not only for autistic individuals, but for ALL neurodivergent people. This is about creating a country where no one is left behind. A country where dignity, accessibility, understanding, reasonable accommodation, patience, and humanity are not privileges reserved for a few, but rights for all.

People ask me all the time:
“Why do you fight so hard?”
“Why are you so passionate about this?”
“What do you gain from this?”

The answer is painfully simple.

Because for some of us, this is not advocacy.

This is survival.

I need people to understand something today. Truly understand it.

When I speak about discrimination, exclusion, victimisation, sensory overwhelm, anxiety, accessibility, and reasonable accommodation, I am not speaking from textbooks. I am not speaking from theory. I am speaking from lived experience.

I live it.
Sammi lives it.
Ma lives it,
Our family lives it.

Every. Single. Day.

As an autistic individual, and as part of an autistic couple, there is no “switching off” from advocacy. We do not wake up every morning looking for fights or opportunities to educate society. Society brings those battles to us daily.

Every outing becomes a calculation.
Every interaction becomes emotional labour.
Every public space becomes unpredictable.

Will people understand?
Will they stare?
Will they become impatient?
Will they mock us?
Will they show kindness?

Or will we once again be reminded that we live in a society that still does not understand neurodivergence?

Today was one of those reminders.

This afternoon, Sammi and I went to Pick n Pay On Nicol. It is one of the very few places where we actually feel safe. Quiet. Predictable. Sensory friendly. It is part of our routine. A place where I can stim without feeling constantly judged. A place where we can simply exist without masking every second of our lives.

Sammi decided to do the shopping herself today.

For many people, that sounds ordinary. Small. Insignificant.

But for us, it was huge.

Because independence for a neurodivergent person in a world that constantly underestimates you is an act of courage.

Sammi is semi-verbal, autistic, and alexic. Processing information can take a little longer sometimes. That means patience matters. Tone matters. Facial expressions matter. Body language matters.

Kindness matters.

We went to the under-10-items till like we always do. Sammi handed the basket to the cashier and waited quietly.

Then everything changed.

The cashier responded aggressively and impatiently:
“No, this is not how it works here. You must take the stuff out of the basket.”

Her tone was sharp. Dismissive. Irritated.

Sammi froze.

The cashier repeated herself again. Louder this time. Rolling her eyes. Another staff member laughed nearby.

And in that moment, I watched my wife’s confidence disappear right in front of me.

I stepped in calmly and said:
“Please be patient. My wife is autistic and alexic.”

The cashier responded with:
“What?”

I explained again.

“What?”

Again.

Then she leaned closer in a sarcastic and challenging manner while smirking.

Something inside of me snapped.
Because people must understand something about me.

I can tolerate many things directed at myself. I have survived exclusion my entire life. I was non-verbal until 15 years old. I know what it feels like to be underestimated, dismissed, misunderstood, and treated as less than human.

But I will NEVER tolerate someone humiliating my wife.

Never.

Not publicly.
Not anywhere.

Especially not because of a hidden disability.

I raised my voice and said firmly:
“My wife has a disability. Please be kind and patient.”

And what shattered me most was not even the words.

It was the look.

That look of disgust.
That look of irritation.
That look that says:
“You are difficult.”
“You are a problem.”
“You do not belong here.”

We walked out.

And then Sammi started crying.

Not loud crying. Not dramatic crying.

The kind of crying that comes from deep confusion and heartbreak.

She looked at me and asked:
“Why do they do this to me?”
“What is wrong with me?”
“Am I not allowed to come here anymore?”

I cannot explain the pain of hearing Sammi asking whether they are allowed to exist in public spaces.

That pain stays with you.

Because people do not realise what these moments do to neurodivergent individuals.

They do not see the years of rebuilding confidence after humiliation.
They do not see the masking.
They do not see the exhaustion.
They do not see the fear of going back into society afterwards.

Sammi is one of the gentlest human beings I have ever met. She is kind beyond words. Innocent. Pure-hearted. An earth angel untouched by the cruelty and hardness of this world.

And today society reminded her that the world can still be cruel.

When we got home, Ma phoned the store manager while Sammi cried. Myself and Ma then drove back to the store because silence helps nobody.

We were angry. Hurt. Exhausted.

But something important happened there.

The managers listened.

Truly listened.

We explained autism. Neurodivergence. Invisible impairments. Reasonable accommodation. Accessibility. Human dignity. The UNCRPD. The emotional impact of public humiliation.

And then something unexpected happened.

The cashier started crying too.

The managers admitted openly that staff had never received autism or neurodiversity training.

And suddenly the moment stopped being about punishment.

It became about humanity.

About education.
About growth.
About understanding.

We made it clear that we did not want revenge or punishment. We wanted change.

Because this is not about confronting or humiliating people.
It is about helping society understand people like us.

I want to commend the management at Pick n Pay On Nicol for taking accountability, apologising sincerely, and being willing to learn. That matters. It really does.

From our experiences today, they will immediately place the necessary reasonable accommodations for Sammi, me and other neurodivergent individual and their families:

🍎Support during shopping and guidance. A private checkout for neurodiverse individuals and families is available.
🍎Families are encouraged to approach staff to disclose their child's needs or specific neurodiversity for tailored assistance.

But today also reminded me how unbelievably far behind South Africa still is when it comes to understanding neurodivergence and invisible disabilities in public.

We are still at the stage where people are learning what autism even is in the majority places.

That is why this National Autism Strategy matters.

Because what happened to us today is happening to millions of families across this country. Quietly. Daily. Behind closed doors. In shops. Schools. Universities. Restaurants. Workplaces. Churches. Public transport. Everywhere.

And many people suffer in silence because they are too exhausted to keep explaining themselves to the world.

This is also why campaigns like the Hidden Disabilities Sunflower matter so deeply.

The sunflower speaks a language beyond words.

It says:
Be patient.
Be understanding.
Be kind.
This person may be struggling in ways you cannot immediately see.

So please… never ask me again why I fight so hard for this.

This is not politics for me.
This is not branding.
This is not social media activism.
This is not ego.

This is our life.

And until neurodivergent individuals can exist in South Africa without fear of humiliation, exclusion, or misunderstanding…

I will continue fighting.

Because every single human being deserves dignity.
Every single human being deserves understanding.
And every single life has value.

This is me.

This is Sammi.

This is Ma Kim Hicks

This is our reality.

This is Dr Emile Gouws.

Please sign up to the campaign to initiate change:

https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSfCz5wNLFYSvf-dMN2L2jrFDFvOatZiWMVpij2tmSWkEW85Aw/viewform?usp=header

Pick n Pay Pick n Pay Department of Women, Youth and Persons with Disabilities Raising Ayden Gauteng Provincial Government (GPG) Gauteng Health Department I Love Fourways Sandton Chronicle Good Things Guy Better Bryanston Sandhurst

𝗣𝗹𝗮𝘆 𝗶𝘀 𝗻𝗼𝘁 𝗷𝘂𝘀𝘁 𝗳𝘂𝗻, 𝗶𝘁'𝘀 𝗳𝗼𝘂𝗻𝗱𝗮𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻𝗮𝗹!
From solo play to parallel play, pretend play to sensory play, each type of play creates opportunities for meaningful growth and development.

What may appear simple on the surface is actually powerful developmental work. In DIRFloortime, play allows us to meet a child where they are and expand their developmental capacities through meaningful, shared interactions.

To my TEAM - how blessed am I to have a group who are so passionate, loving, nurturing, fun and all round just the very best!! Without you, there would be no Rise! You always have smiles on your faces and nothing is ever too much to ask. But most importantly each of you love our children wholeheartedly and that’s what makes you the very best!
Thank you, team!! So grateful for you and adore each of you 🩷🧡💛💚🩵💜

Did you miss Autism Acceptance Day on 2 April?
Let’s make it Autism Acceptance MONTH. You can purchase a sticker for the month of April! Let’s make every day Autism Acceptance Day 🩷🧡💛💚🩵💜