Dr. John S. Balogun

Do you know that you cannot complain about your children if you are genuinely praying for them?

I share a story in this article that can change the way you view parenting. Read it slowly and to the end!

Yes!

Many times, we start complaining about our children as soon as we finish praying for them.

You must learn to patiently follow up with your prayers for your children. You're not asking for magic to happen when you pray, you are rather praying for a change. Most lasting changes happen in bits, it takes time.

In fact, some children will still not behave well regardless of how much you try but your ability to behave well to them is what God will use eventually to change them.

But if you are always nagging and complaining about them, and punishing them for every step they take, Satan may use your own bad attitude against both you and your child.

Many times, all that God needs to change our children is for us parents to just act rightly.

For example, there was a time my mum was so busy with church activities that she did not really care about us but about her reputation in the church. I'm sure she didn't mean to do that but that was how we saw it.

Every time, she would come to the house to scold us for embarrassing her in the church. The more she punished us, the worse we became.

At a point, the church leadership began to threaten her that if she does not control us and make us behave well, they would stop her from being a worker in the church. She was women leader at the time.

Then, she would come home and shout on us out of frustration, asking if we wanted the leadership to sack her. As for us, our unspoken response was, 'who cares?`

Until one day, I think she got frustrated by her frustrations and the threat from her leaders. She went to meet the leadership of the church and voluntarily resigned saying, 'I want to go and look after my home, kindly let someone else lead the women because I am not worthy to lead them until I have my children under control'.

Mum came back home a different person, nothing like 'do you want them to stop me from working for God?', 'Why are you embarrassing me?', etcetera.

She began to see her family as her number one ministry, then she started engaging us one after another. We began to see how much she loves us. She became gentle with us and more understanding. Then, we started listening to her.

If it was time to go to church, and she noticed we were not interested in following her, she would just start church with us in the house. We were surprised to see her miss church activities but happy to see her create time for us.

I remembered how she would sit down with me to discuss the Bible and both of us would argue over some verses.

She no longer bother about her reputation but more about the future of her children.

One night, I woke up to urinate and then I heard her praying in her room, with groanings and I heard my name as she was praying in Yoruba language, 'Oluwa, gba Seyi la', meaning 'Oh Lord, save Seyi's life'. My middle name is 'Seyifunmi'

My head got big like it's going to burst. I felt extremely loved and it was like God had just appeared to me. I am crying as I write this because I'm feeling right now exactly the way I felt that night over 20 years ago.

That was the turning point for me. God used my mum's right attitude to change me and it's a testimony today.

When you forget about your reputation and focus on how you can mold your child in the way they should go, God will ensure that when they grow up, they will not depart from it.

Complain less about your child, pray more for them. Complaints and prayers are not compatible, you can only do one at a time.

I am Dr. John S. Balogun and it's my prayers that we will no longer neutralize our prayers for our children using our complaints about them.

Please do share with others.

My Counsel today will be for girls, ladies and women. There will be a separate article for the boys and gentlemen.

Please develop self-control. Read to the end so you can understand why I said this. You will do well to share also with other people in your circle.
__________
Another word for 'self-control' is 'self discipline'.

Proverbs 25:28 says that the person who does not have control over her life is like a city with broken walls.
__________
If you are not disciplined as a lady, you will open up your spring of life to cruel invaders.

If it is every time you 'feel like' having s*x that you are looking for someone to meet the need, you will have serious problems a time will come that no stapler will be able to hold your broken heart together.

__________
I remember several years ago, a 14 year old beautiful girl came to me that she wanted me to have s*xual in*******se with her; I was about 17 years old at the time. I wasn't born again as at then but something inside me was scared of doing it.

Even though I felt like doing it, my heartbeat got very fast, my body was shaking at the sight of free s*x but I didn't oblige.
__________
I can't really remember how I left her that day but I did not succumb to her request; I am sure it was God who kept me from doing that great wickedness.
__________
About 2 years later, this beautiful lady became pregnant while in Junior Secondary School. That was the end of her study. So sad!

More sad, however, is that the guy who impregnated her did not stop his own school, he continued schooling but for her, no secondary school would allow a pregnant teenage girl in the classroom.
__________
Her problem was that she did not have control over her emotions, her s*xual urge and she was like a city without wall, without gates, opened 24/7 to invaders.
__________
Please allow me to talk to you my beloved sister;
__________
❓Do you know you will be more affected negatively if you engage in premarital s*x? If you know, I think you are supposed to close your laps till you marry; if you don't know, now I am telling you. Read on!

❓ Do you know you are the one who will get pregnant when you indulge in premarital s*x? If you do, I think it is wise to just close your legs for now;
__________
❓ Do you know you are the one who is at risk of abortion with its complications? If you do, I think it is wise and honourable to say no to that guy's request for s*x; unless he's a ra**st, he will not force you if you say NO and walk away.

❓ If you decide not to do abortion after getting pregnant, do you know you are the one who will go around the street carrying big tummy up and down when you don't have a husband? If you know, you should be disciplined enough to ensure your wall is kept tight and not invaded by people who only are attracted to your body and not your 'good heart';
__________
❓Do you know you are the one that your parents will likely throw out of the house because you disgraced them? If you do, you are supposed to be more careful;

❓ Do you know you are the one that will likely stop going to school because of pregnancy? Since you know, you should make efforts to put your s*xual urge under control and say, "Hey s*xual urge! calm down, it is NOT yet time!";
__________
What about s*xually transmitted infections...❓
__________
Have you ever realized that nature has designed your private part to be like a 'receiver'? Have you thought about this?

🤷‍♂ If you have, then you are supposed to be careful, therefore, of what you receive, when you receive it and from whom you receive it.

Your private part is not expected to be opened for reception of ANYTHING until you marry and when you marry, it is expected to receive things from only one person, your husband.
__________
You will be a wise lady/woman if you keep your wall intact and your gate closed. This will prevent your spring of life from being invaded by merciless invaders.

Even if you have been invaded before now, you can rebuild your wall today and keep your gate closed again till you marry.
__________

I hope you have been instructed?
Feel free to share with your others!

Remain blessed - with your gate closed!
__________
Dr. John S. Balogun

Sometime ago I was going through deep (very deep) pain due to a very significant setback in my life and one of my friends said he does not think I should have such experience if I hadn't committed a sin. He felt it was God punishing me for my sins.

I felt more grieved with his comment and I frankly told him that his understanding of the Person of God was faulty.

We must understand that as long as we are in this world, we will experience pain, deep pain at one time or another in our lives.

If it hasn't happened to you, don't attribute it to the prayers or fastings or vigils you do or the holy life you live; people who do these spiritual activities more than you have been hit with all kinds of storms in this life.

Anyone who tells you that you won't experience pains once you're a child of God is not telling you the truth.

You can be a child of God and still be broke. You can be a child of God and not be able to send your children to good school or feed them 3 square meals daily.

None of these is a sign that you have committed sin or you're under a curse. It only means that you don't have some advantages that others have in this world.

Comfort, wealth and prosperity are not evidences of salvation. The evidence that you are saved is the Holy spirit bearing witness with your spirit that you are a child of God. Full stop!

Many enjoy the goodness of life because they were born into wealth and comfort; comparing yourself with such people will make you more miserable.

Look at where you are now and compare it with where you were. You will see the need to celebrate the remarkable progress you have made.

You can have SUFFICIENT GRACE IN YOUR LIFE and still have THORNS IN YOUR BODY. Ask Apostle Paul.

Don't despair! God promised to be with you in your pains.

The pain you are going through or the one you may experience is not a punishment for your past mistakes.

God does not punish you for the sins He has forgiven you.

God does not hold your past sins against you. As long as you have confessed your sins to God, He forgives you completely without any remembrance of it.

Satan, on the other hands, will come to you and try to convince you that you were not forgiven. Then, your feelings of guilt will come back.

God doesn't make anyone feel guilty. He will rather make you feel remorseful about any wrong you have done so that you can come to Him for help.

Your pain should draw you closer to God. If yours is pushing you away from God, you should know that Satan is already in control of your heart. Rebuke him sharply and find your way back to God.

If you are in pain or you're going through some difficult moment, make an honest assessment of your situation and tell yourself frank truth.

If there's something you are not doing well, make some adjustments and take corrective measures.

But if after you have checked around, you can't pinpoint what is causing your pain, simply allow God to calm your spirit and enjoy His sufficient grace as you pass through the water or fire.

Unfortunately, life refines us through furnaces of pain, affliction and humiliation. Don't worry, you will be just fine.

Finally, everyone feels pain in one area of their lives but most people pretend.

Don't let anyone make you feel worse. They may be going through a more severe one secretly. Own up to your pain and enjoy the peace that Jesus promised.

Don't hesitate to open up yourself to genuine help if you feel you need to talk to someone.

If you're reading this and you are going through any form of pain, may you experience the peaceful, loving and the healing touch of Jesus Christ. Amen

I am Dr. John S. Balogun and I care about you.

Please share!

🚨🚨🚨
Entry closes tonight Friday, June 12, 2026, at 6:49 pm WAT. Training begins immediately for Batch 43 of our wholesome s*x education program!

Use this link if you have not yet partaken in previous batches:

https://chat.whatsapp.com/L1xO2QYKBfJ2GP5CXxiUVa

Kindly share...

Registration for Batch 43 Wholesome S*x Education training for new participants is ongoing.

Registration, training and certificate is 100% FREE.

The training starts at 7:00 PM GMT +1 of Friday, June 12, 2026.

Kindly inform others - parents, teachers, etcetera to join us to learn how to teach our children and young people age-appropriate s*x education.

Let them send a WhatsApp message to +234 815 098 9646 or click the link:
https://chat.whatsapp.com/L1xO2QYKBfJ2GP5CXxiUVa

In the 3rd year of our marriage, my wife and I had a very tough misunderstanding that degenerated into a week long bitterness, resentment and malice.

As things continued to get worse, I became uneasy and had to consult with my mentor.

I told him everything that happened and he gave me a simple counsel, or let me say, an instruction.

He said, "Son, go and beg your wife".

My head turned imaginarily 360 degrees wondering if my mentor understood all I said.

But I had made up mind that I would ALWAYS listen to and obey my mentor as long as what he says does not contradict scriptural principles and good sense.

So, I swallowed my pride and looked for an opportunity to apologize to my wife.

The outcome was dramatic. I was surprised to see how easily my wife also apologized.

That was how we chased the devil out of our home.

This devil wasn't the devil who lives in hell but the one who lives in our individual ego and personal pride. It was the devil who hides under the spirit of unforgiveness to rob us of the peace, love and joy we were supposed to experience in our marriage.

After that event, I took out time to wait on the Lord, and in one of those days, I got engaged through my spirit's communion with the Holy Spirit.

Then, the question came, 'Do you know that it takes two people to quarrel in a relationship or marriage? No matter how quarrelsome one partner is, if the other is not interested, do you know there will never be a quarrel?'

I nodded in agreement.

Then, the instruction came, 'For you to enjoy continuous peace, love and harmony in your marriage, make up your mind to always pay the price of peace'.

I got the message, loud and clear!

I rose up from that encounter and our home has never been the same.

I made up my mind that I would ALWAYS pay the price of peace, no matter how much it deals with my pride and ego.

I intentionally forgot about who or what I was, and rather focused on having a beautiful home, where everyone is happy to grow, love and thrive.

This simple principle chased the devil out of our home till date.

With time, my wife began to learn from me and now, she pays more price of peace than I am paying, our heart is knitted in love pursuing the same purpose.

A positive attitude is contagious, so is a negative one.

A happy marriage is not automatic, no one is guaranteed a good home; it comes from being intentional about what you want.

You may have a difficult partner but the Bible says you should pay the price of peace. Jesus said you are blessed for being a peacemaker.

You may not see the result in one month or one year but it will come.

I grew up seeing chaos in my parents' marriage but I saw my Mum and Dad at different times always making out for peace. It took them 16 years to chase the devil out.

When you see my Dad and Mum today, you will admire their relationship. They have become a good model for ours.

Chase the devil of pride and ego out of your relationship or marriage, pay the price of peace, embrace love and forgiveness and you will be happy ever after.

I hope this helps your relationship and marriage to thrive and flourish.

Cheers!
__________
Dr. John S. Balogun teachers on Christian Living, Youth Life, Wholesome S*x Education, Family Life, Relationship, Marriage & Parenting.
Follow this channel to glean from the wisdom he shares daily.

https://whatsapp.com/channel/0029VaFcVH0Lo4hbflHqWE2i

Someone pried a little into my private life and I have decided to share it with you also. I hope it inspires you and helps you become a better version of yourself.

1. I got born again at age 19. My life before age 19 was that of a difficult, stubborn and rebellious teenager, a thorn in the flesh of my parents and the church but then Jesus saved me still. People gave up but Jesus came for me and here I am today.

2. Shortly after I got born again, I became a book addict. I literally read every Christian book I came across. I noticed that I was a 'read & practice' kind of person. So, when I read, I tried to act it out. This influenced me a whole lot. I became spiritually broken and grew in my relationship with God.

3. From books, I was able to learn how to be a good leader. I was a General Coordinator (President) in Deeper Life Campus Fellowship (DLCF) for 3 consecutive years during my undergraduate studies. This gave me a lot of opportunities and experiences that helped me to really develop my leadership skills.

4. I am not sure how it happened but it was very easy for me to observe people's marriage, recognize the positive traits for my own adoption, and then filter out the negative ones. I have been influenced greatly by some people's marriage and this gave me confidence that with God's help, my own marriage too will work.

5. Before marriage, I read quite a lot of books on relationship and marriage including the ones they said it's only for the lady, just so I can learn how to get my wife along safely. It's playing out pretty well so far.

6. I read some books too on family life, how to be a good father and a good husband. My 'read & practice' attitude has helped me a lot.

7. I also have this believe that anyone can change. It all depends on the willingness to change.

One thing I don't do is to excuse or rationalize my negative attitudes. Once I recognize it or someone points my attention to it, I will begin to deal with it immediately until I get rid of it.

8. As for my kids, I create time for them intentionally. Child training must be intentional, otherwise things will fall apart.

No matter how tired I get, it's a must to create time to play with them, make them laugh, cry and laugh again. I often record our play times to keep memories and to play it with them anytime I'm not disposed to play with them. They often laugh again when watching it. Play time has been the most profitable time for them to learn from me.

9. As for my wife, if I don't win her into my team, I will have an opponent living under my roof in no distant time. It's also an intentional thing. My method is to win people around me over and encourage them to get fulfillment in what I am asking them to do.

My wife is happy to do what she's doing because she's finding fulfillment in what I'm telling her to do. It's not about me but about her, so it's easy to get her along. I always try to motivate and encourage her and make her find purpose and fulfill it. Then, I give her support and platform to manifest her gifts.

So, what can you say about all these? Is there any of the points you will like to adopt? Do you have additional counsel for me that can help me to improve? Or do you have questions? Let me hear from you. You can make comments or just send me an email, [email protected]

Do well to share.
__________
Dr. John S. BALOGUN

A colleague of mine invited me to come to his hospital to assist with the resuscitation of a newborn baby they were planning to deliver.

It was a high risk pregnancy and they felt that the newborn would need a Specialist Doctor's attention on delivery.

He had informed them he would be inviting a paediatrician (child health specialist) to be present in the theater during the caesarean delivery.

I obliged to be there to attend to the baby at birth.

On the D day, I was dressed simply in a T-shirt and a pair of chinos trousers and walked into the hospital ward.

My colleague introduced me to the family as the Paediatrician they had been waiting for.

I could see the disappointment on their faces. It was a familiar look of 'Who is this small boy?'. They were expecting a more mature looking doctor.

My colleague who invited me had a bigger stature with mature facial hair compared to me, small stature with clean hairless face. Even the small facial hairs, I often shave it off every 3 days.

I was used to those type of looks. There was a time I was a Chemistry teacher at age 19 years with a good number of my students older than me. The only thing that differentiated me was that I wasn't wearing school uniform.

So, I ignored their perception of me, greeted them, engaged and explained to them some of the challenges the baby may have and how I would prevent or solve the problems.

The baby was eventually delivered. A whole extended family had been expecting this baby for several years. They were watching through the glass. There were challenges as I predicted but by God's grace, I was able to solve them and stabilize the baby.

Everything was fine and I was about leaving when one of the family members voiced out and said,

"Small, but mighty doctor", then other members of the team smiled and thanked me, with firm handshakes.

When Paul told Timothy that he should not allow anyone to despise his youths, it was a very necessary instruction.

I have found out that when you have small stature, like me, or you are from a humble background, or you don't dress in affluence, people will attempt to look down on you but the only way to prevent this is by knowing your onions. Excellence is your revenge.

Be serious at what you do. Be exceptional. Most people would not mind swallowing their pride to come to you when they know you are a 'go-to' person.

Let it be that when they need someone who will not disappoint, they would look for you. Even when they want to ignore you, they should have difficulty doing so.

This you can do by being intentional with your personal development and growth.

When others are sleeping and wasting time on social media, work on yourself. Develop and grow.

Become a hot cake, add values, and you will see people on queue to have a taste of you.

In fact, the Bible says, regardless of your age, stature, s*x or race, if you are diligent in what you do, you will be privileged to stand before kings and not before ordinary people.

Don’t let anyone think less of you because you are young or because of your background. Be an example to all believers in what you say, in the way you live, in your love, your faith, and your purity. 1 Timothy 4:12 NLT

I am Dr. John S. Balogun, I have been looked down upon severally just because of my 'Smallie' stature but when they find out what I can offer, I always earn my respect.

Work more on your content than on your container because containers get old with time and time always reveal the content.

🚨🚨🚨
Entry closes tomorrow Friday, May 15, 2026, at 6:49 pm WAT. Training begins immediately for Batch 42 of our wholesome s*x education program!

Use this link if you have not yet partaken in previous batches:

https://chat.whatsapp.com/COpVMT3pJL5Jmtesniztrk

Good evening sir, please I need more clarity concerning relationship. In a situation someone sees a man who has same mind (like the scriptures says we should make friend with people of the same mind). Now, these two people started having a relationship in their minds, although they won't marry each other because the man has a wife already, but they are just friends. Please my question is, is it right to keep building the relationship even if they have just fun which I think can actually leads to s*x?

Response by Dr. John S. Balogun:

Thank you very much for your question and for seeking clarity.

The situation you are describing is one that the Bible addresses with great urgency because it involves the "deceitfulness of the heart."

While it is true that we should seek fellowship with those of "like mind" (Philippians 2:2), this scriptural principle is intended for the building up of the Body of Christ, not for creating emotional or physical intimacy with someone who is already bound in a marriage covenant.

The idea that a man and a woman can build a deep, "fun" relationship while acknowledging they can never marry is a dangerous spiritual trap.

Proverbs 6:27-28 asks very pointedly, "Can a man scoop fire into his lap without his clothes being burned? Can a man walk on hot coals without his feet being scorched?"

By continuing to build this relationship, you are essentially playing with fire. You mentioned that this friendship "can actually lead to s*x."
This is a typical example of making "provision for the flesh."

Romans 13:14 commands us to "make no provision for the flesh, to fulfill the lusts thereof."

If you stay in a situation where you know sin is a likely outcome, you are no longer walking in friendship; you are walking in disobedience.

You must consider the third person in this equation: the man's wife.

Matthew 7:12 tells us to "do to others what you would have them do to you." If you were the wife, would you want another woman having "fun" and building a "one-mind" relationship with your husband?

By engaging with him this way, you are participating in the betrayal of a holy covenant.

Hebrews 13:4 says marriage should be honoured by all. This means even those outside the marriage must respect its boundaries.

To build a relationship with a married man that borders on s*xual intimacy is to dishonour God’s institution of marriage.

The Bible warns us in Jeremiah 17:9 that "the heart is deceitful above all things..."

Your mind may tell you that this is just a deep friendship, but your spirit is already sensing the danger. This is why you are asking for clarity.

True "same-mindedness" in Christ would lead both of you to flee from this situation to protect your souls.

1 Corinthians 6:18 does not say to "negotiate" with s*xual immorality; it says to "Flee!"

Clarity comes when we stop trying to justify what we know is wrong. If a relationship is leading you toward sin, it is not from God. The most "Christian" and loving thing you can do for yourself, for this man, and for his wife, is to cut off this relationship immediately.

Matthew 5:30 says if your right hand causes you to stumble, cut it off. It is better to lose a friendship than to lose your peace and your standing before God.

Cheers.